Where to Start?

Friends,

It's been AGES since I've shared with you.  Frankly, for months, I haven't known where to start or what to say.  So much has happened.  At times, I'm still working to wrap my own mind and heart around the realities of it all.

I won't share much today, but I'm going to at least get the conversation started, so I can share more details with you when the time is right.

Our family had opened up our hearts to the idea of foster care a little over a year ago.  In a crazy turn of events, we were presented with the idea of a private adoption situation in July.  We also then learned that the baby was due in August.  Our lives became a whirlwind.  My hubby prepping for the start of a new school year and for the substitute teacher that would take his place while waiting for the baby to be born.  Our family getting the finishing touches done on our baby nursery and prepping diaper bags and rewashing newborn clothes and packing all kinds of baby stuff.  We packed up our home and lined up dear friends and family and neighbors to mow our lawn and pick the crops from our garden and get our mail and keep and eye on our home and cover our responsibilities at church  and more.  We prepped emotionally, and yet, I've learned that you can never prep enough for the roller coaster of emotions that goes along with adoption and foster care and a newborn and everything connected to it.

I'm still wrapping my mind around what just happened to us, and slowly, life is beginning to feel more normal again.

************

We are BEYOND GRATEFUL to each one of you who stepped in to help while we were away...and who BLESSED US BEYOND MEASURE once we arrive HOME.  Delicious meals, baked goods, and homemade oatmeal and soup and applesauce and jelly arrived for weeks.  Boxes of baby boy clothes and cans of formula and packs of diapers showed up time and time again.  Encouraging greeting cards arrived in the mail.  Baby swings were lent to us.  Groceries were dropped off when needed.  Starbucks coffees showed up in the hands of friends who wanted to meet our baby and bless me. Prayers, texts, and phone calls reminded us of your support.  Offers were extended for fun play dates and day trips for our daughter as she, too, adjusted to everything spinning around her.  I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but just know that if YOU were one of the people that blessed us, you touched our hearts and were the hands and feet of Jesus to us when we needed you most.  THANK YOU!!!

I have so much more to share.  But I will save it for another time.  I couldn't think of a better time to express our gratitude than this time of year when Thanksgiving is just around the corner.

This year, I'm reminded of the COMMUNITY we have around us, and the blessing our community is to our family.  Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

...Waiting...

I haven't posted anything on my blog for well over a month.  Believe me, I've contemplated posting many times.  But today, I want to share a foster care update with you --

It's no major update.

But I want you to know that we're continuing to wait for our placement.  

To date, we became official foster care parents at the end of September.  During the months of October and November, we received four calls within four weeks for four separate placement possibilities.  We declined all four, holding out for the little one (that may or may not even be in utero yet).  This little one is the whole reason we started the process of becoming an approved foster care family, and we feel at-peace about waiting for this specific situation.

Thoughts and questions enter our minds.  Sometimes often.

*How long do we wait?  

*When will we find out if or when this birthmom is due?

*Should we consider other foster care placements before this one?

*Am I capable of doing this?

*What if this doesn't work out?  

*Is it foolish for us to wait?  Should I worry what others will think?

*Will we have to wait nearly two years like we waited for our daughter?

*Do we put things on hold as we wait?  Dreams. Vacations. Hobbies.

For us, it's a balance.  We want to be proactive.  We want to do our part and be responsible.  But we also want to trust.  And part of that trusting involves waiting.  It could be more hours.  More days.  More months.  Even more years.  I don't like waiting.  I want things now.  Yesterday, in fact.  By nature, I like to have things in order.  But the Lord has taught (and continues to teach) me patience, contentment, and trust.  And as I've slowly begun to understand this "learning moment" in my life, God's granted me (us, really) a peace that passes all understanding.

I experienced that same peace when adopting our daughter.  I had never experienced that kind of peace before that time in my life.  But I trust it more now because it was very real then.  And very right.  That same sense of peace now reminds me that God is in control.  That peace reassures me that things are going to be okay; maybe not quite as I planned but as they are meant to be.  That peace also calms my heart and mind in those moments that I doubt or begin to wonder or worry what others might think.  

So as long as my trust is in the Lord, I can rest in knowing that this peace is part of the plan that He has for my life.  "If God is for me, who can be against me?"  I wish I had more of an update to give, but please know that we're doing okay, and I'm thankful that I can know that God's hand is in this whole foster care process for us.  

One day, I will again look back at how the details all aligned for this season of my life and give God all of the glory.  We are your instruments, Lord - use us.  In Your timing.  Your perfect timing.

Wreath Ideas

Nesting Place is an adorable blog with great ideas for your home.  Right now, they're encouraging their readers to share their own wreath design ideas on their website, and I've decided to share mine!  There are dozens of great wreath ideas for you to check out...and maybe even try designing yourself.  Enjoy!

  

I found this square wreath at Flower and Home Marketplace (formerly the "Flower & Craft Warehouse" in Blue Ball, PA).  I added a variety of artificial succulents, plants, and berries.  The succulents were all purchased at Michael's.  I then wrapped a natural jute twine around the lower left-hand corner of the wreath in two places.  Everything was attached to the wreath with a hot glue gun.

http://www.thenester.com/#

(My wreath is #121.)

Honoring Birthdays

We just celebrated our daughter's FOURTH birthday last week!!!

I love the joy and celebration that surrounds a birthday.  But as an adoptive momma, I also can't help but think of our daughter's birth-mom on those days, too.  Our joy may very well still be her pain.  Her separation and heartache became our joy and reason to celebrate in early November each year.  

Schedules, timing, life going on...whatever the reason may be...it just hasn't worked out this year for us to meet up with our daughter's biological family.  I can feel guilty about this.  I've sent emails, expressing the invitation to get together with them, but as with all open adoption relationships, there's no set formula for staying connected.  No official plans have been made.  What was once a yearly get-together for our family with our daughter's biological family may be changing...or maybe not.  

But one thing that stays the same is her biological family's birthdays each year, too.  Our connection to Mya's biological family has been primarily with three people: her biological mom, her biological grandma, and her half-brother.  And they ALL have November birthdays, as well.  

It may seem small.  It may seem unnecessary.  But for us, we like to honor their birthdays each year by sending them a card.  And as our daughter's gotten older, she's enjoyed adding her special artist touches to their cards.  We're getting ready to mail these cards and drawings out soon --

On her own, our daughter wanted to include the words "You are so special" and "I love you" in her drawings for her biological mom.  I'm proud of her for choosing those words.  It kinda caught me off guard; it can feel sort of scary for her to say those words to me about her biological mom.  But I'm choosing to support our daughter's words.  In fact, I'm thankful that that's her perception of this woman in her life.  I'm thankful for the respect and love that she does have for her.  My prayer is that our daughter's birth-mom will receive these special gifts with love and appreciation and not hurt and pain.  

Being an adoptive mom (and hopefully soon-to-be foster mom), life continues to be a learning curve.  Navigating birthdays and holidays.  Explaining life and how our family was formed.  Completing school projects in the years ahead - family trees, family history.  But through God's grace, I desire for Him to work through me each step of the way.  

No life event is too big (or too small) for our God to handle.  

Need any COSTUME ideas?

I don't know about the area you live in, but around here, our Goodwill stores are still STOCKED with Halloween costumes (...or items you could piece together to come up with a great costume...).  And the best part is that their costumes are at a FRACTION of the price of what you'll pay in an actual Halloween store.  Just this week, I found a look-alike "ANNA" (from "Frozen") dress for our daughter at Goodwill for only $4.50.  She was thrilled!!!  Think outside the box - Goodwill, Salvation Army, garage sales, or even your own closet! 

With Halloween being a little less than a week away, here are a few EASY ideas for last-minute DIY costumes....

STARBUCKS Pumpkin Spice Latte



TY Beanie Babies



LIPTON Tea Bag



JELLY BELLY Jelly Beans



LEGOS



Washing Machine & Laundry Basket



UPS Delivery Man



PLAY-DOH



Rock, Paper, Scissors


*AND* 
Don't forget -- Often the day or so after Halloween, Goodwill's costumes get marked down (i.e. 50% off the Goodwill price or more) because they wanna clear their store to make room for Christmas items.  Last year, I found lots of great costumes for only a buck or two for our daughter's dress-up bin, her themed dress-up days for preschool (like "community helper" day), and so on.  Anything from a cowgirl to a doctor.  But -- Once they're gone, they're gone!

It's OFFICIAL...

We're now an APPROVED FOSTER FAMILY for Berks County Children & Youth Services.  

I was both surprised and excited to see two emails in my inbox today from our caseworkers, letting us know this news.  

So many of you have asked how this process is going for us and have let us know you're praying for us, and we thank you!  The Lord continues to fill us with a "peace that passes all understanding," and for that, we are grateful and excited to open our home and our hearts in this way.

Almost daily, our daughter Mya lets me know of her excitement, too.  Just today while driving in the car, she said, "Mommy, I have so much love for our baby.  So much love for our baby and for you and for Daddy."  The Lord is so closely walking alongside her little heart, as well.  

 And on one other random side note, we were just blessed with a free infant car seat.  A sweet friend (...shout out to Katie D!...) shared on Facebook several weeks ago about a grant that a local police officer received which allowed him to giveaway brand new car seats.  I took a chance yesterday and called the police department, and they had an INFANT car seat still available.  It's already been safely installed into our car by the police officer, so we're officially ready-to-go!  (And it sounds like he'll be getting more car seats in a variety of sizes soon through an additional grant, so contact me for more details if you or someone you know may benefit from this wonderful blessing.)

So for now, we just wait.  Expectantly.  :)

Something NEW is on the Horizon for Our Family!

The events of our summer months have evolved into a change for our family.  I've tossed around how to go about sharing this news, but this seems to be the best way I can think of doing it --

We are happy to announce that we are officially becoming a foster care family!

The decision hasn't come quickly.  We've given it countless hours of thought.  We've talked it over with our families and dear friends.  We've educated ourselves about what this will mean for our family.  And we're super excited!

When this idea was first presented to us by an extended family member, we hesitated.  And wanted to take things slowly.  The change seemed scary.  And to be honest, it still does, at times.  But as we made the decision to move forward and began the process of becoming an approved foster care family, the necessary steps have unraveled as needed and at just the right time.  We were able to complete a stack of paperwork quickly...including having our clearances returned to us promptly.  We were able to attend all four required trainings in four consecutive weeks (we had nothing else on our calendar the evenings of each training which was a semi-miracle in-and-of itself).  Our home's well water tests all came back good.  And our caseworker visited our home.  Our official home study should be completed and approved within the next week.  We have just the right amount of non-perishable foods and a bottled water supply to last us for 3-days in the event of a natural disaster.  I now have a "no smoking" sign on my refrigerator and an emergency evacuation plan in place.

And this has all happened literally within just the last six weeks.

It feels like a bit of a whirlwind.  And yet, it feels right. We continue to take steps...in faith...and the Lord continues to open doors.  Our trust is resting in the Lord right now.  This feels so similar to our adoption journey for our daughter a couple of years ago...but it also feels quite different.  I'm reminding myself that different isn't always a bad thing.  And in this case, different is going to be a very good thing for us.

Being a foster care family is going to be challenging.  It's going to require faith, patience, wisdom, grace, and trust.  It may require tough decisions and raw emotions.  And I imagine that it will involve tears...possibly lots of tears...but I know that the Lord is with us each step of the way.  And for as long as the Lord continues to open doors for us, we will continue to take steps in faith.

There will be times that I won't be able to share details about the foster care journey on here out of respect for the situation and because of confidentiality.  But we cherish your thoughts and prayers as we step out in faith to see how the Lord will use us.  Thank you, in advance, for walking alongside our family through this new venture.