Meeting Up With Birthmom

We're meeting up with Mya's birthmom in just a few weeks.

To some people, this may seem scary...or maybe even odd.
But for us, it feels right.  It makes us excited to reunite.  It gives us hope for what our future relationship might look like.

This July will mark the third year in a row that we will have the opportunity to meet-up with Mya's birthmom, half-brother, and maternal grandma.  We are so thankful for this chance to see them again, reconnect, and continuing growing our bond between one another.

But it also means some uncertainties, too.

*Will we just pick-up right where we left off from our get-together last summer?
*Will we still have stuff in common to talk about?
*How will Mya behave?
*Will Mya remember these people who are an important part of who she is but that she rarely sees or gets to know better?
*Will there be a day that Mya no longer wants to have these reunions?
*How will Mya's birth-family feel, down the road, about us getting together?  
*Will they want to keep seeing us...with her?  How does that make them feel?  Does it reopen wounds and bring pain back to the forefront of their minds?

I've gotten to the place where I cannot worry about all of these things.  I can't keep questioning.  Sure, these questions do still pass through my mind.  Naturally.  I'm human.  But as time has passed, I've felt more and more that all we can do is take this journey one day at a time.

I can't have expectations.  But I can hope.
I can't force this relationship to stay connected forever.  But I can do all that I can to reach out and show them love.
I can't have unrealistic goals.  But I can allow time (and God's grace) to give us direction.

We meet up with Mya's birth-family...for Mya.  And for her birth-family, too.  We see that it's brought healing and comfort to them...and that brings us peace and joy.  We have the utmost respect for Mya's birth-family...and specifically for her birthmom and birthdad.  For the choice that they made to put Mya first and to put their desires aside.  And for how they made the difficult decision to select another family [us] to parent her.

I cannot imagine having been in their shoes.  And to be honest, if I would have been in their shoes, I don't know if I could have been as strong as they were.  And because of this, it has changed my perspective.  It's given me a deeper appreciation for the decisions people make.  Because until we've walked down the road of another person, we truly don't know what decisions we would make.  And by us staying connected to Mya's birth-family, we're able see this journey through their eyes as well.  We've felt their pain.  We've learned that they continue to grieve at different times.  But we've also shared in their joys, and our lives have become richer in getting to know them.  And because of all of this, we meet up with Mya's birth-family for us, as well.  To learn and grown through this process.

I wouldn't change any part of our journey for one second.

And as our journey continues, we wait...with anxious and excited hearts and minds...for our upcoming chance to spend a couple of hours soaking in the beauty of this family...Mya's birth-family...that we're still getting to know.  Please pray for us...with us...as we anticipate this time together.