Holding Her for the First Time

This past weekend, we celebrated a day special to our family.  The day we held Mya for the first time...THREE years ago.

You see, we had been on an adoption waiting list for just shy of two years when we got the call that a baby was born and its birthmom wanted to meet us.  I cannot even begin to describe the emotions involved in receiving that phone call from our caseworker.  The phone call in which she told us that a birthmom wanted to meet us face-to-face.

We had anticipated this moment for soooo long.  We never knew quite what that moment would feel like, but we sure loved dreaming about it.  And when a date, location, and time were in place to meet this woman, this potential birthmom of our child, we were elated.  We were literally on cloud nine.  Certainly, we still guarded our hearts, knowing that she might not choose us, that she might change her mind, that it wouldn't work out.  But the Lord filled us with such hope and thanksgiving.

We met at a local restaurant.  We were nervous.  And excited.  Ecstatic, really.  And we didn't know what to expect.  What it would be like to meet this woman, this person that would make such an incredible decision for her child.  But it was beautiful.

I can immediately flashback to that day when I take the time to think about it.  I can visualize the booth we sat in.  I can remember that I sat on the right-side of Brandon.  This potential birthmom sat across from me, wedged in between our caseworker and her caseworker.  I can remember ordering a sandwich but having little-to-no appetite.  I can remember the caseworkers facilitating the conversation, at times, and the conversations just flowing very naturally at other moments.  I can remember us sharing our likes and our dislikes and laughing together and relating to one another.  And I can vividly remember the moment that our future child's birthmom would look us in the eyes and tell us that she wanted us to be her child's parents.  That her child was a little girl.  And she asked us if we wanted to meet her that same day.

I can remember leaving the restaurant and driving back to the adoption agency.  I can remember talking with our caseworker and her making sure we were okay and checking in with us.  I can remember Mya's birthmom requesting a moment with her baby...by herself...and feeling nervous but extremely hopeful.  And I can remember when the invitation came to us...from her birthmom...to meet her child...our child.  And I can clearly remember holding Mya for the first time.  I can remember Mya's birthmom gently handing over her baby girl and placing her into my arms.  And the tears just flowed.  Tears of joy, thankfulness, and completeness.  And yet, tears of sadness for this other mom who was giving up her ability to hold her child for much longer.  Forever.

And each year, we love to reflect on that day and celebrate it.  We go back to that very restaurant.  We talk to Mya about that day and remind her of her birthmommy's decision and of how much we love her.  And just this past weekend, we enjoyed a meal together...as a family...with our daughter...in that very restaurant.

And I can't help but feel like gratitude and joy are overflowing from my heart when I reminisce about the timing of everything and about the timing of Mya's home-coming being so close to the Thanksgiving holiday.

Fortune Cookies

Ever since experiencing my first fortune cookie as a kid, I fell in love with them.  There's something so fun and silly about cracking open a cookie (which, by the way, I also love to eat!), unwrapping a little white paper, and discovering your "fortune" for the day.  I'm not a superstitious person, but I find such joy in reading those little papers.  

************

In the midst of our journey to become parents...in the midst of the months and months of waiting and longing, first through infertility and later through the adoption process...we were blessed with such support and love from our family and friends.  Encouragement and love would appear in the most random ways...at the most perfect times.  Cards in the mail, emails, a visit from a friend, lunch with my parents, tickets to concerts, opportunities to attend retreats and hear amazing speakers.  Each way blessed our lives richly and helped us to keep going...even in those moments when we questioned God and wondered if we'd really ever become parents.  

And I will never forget an instance when a FORTUNE COOKIE...a random source of encouragement and wisdom...gave me that boost to keep believing that I would one day become a mom.  

My dad invited me to join him for lunch at a local Chinese buffet.  Like every other visit, our meal concluded with the delivery of our check to our table...on a little black plastic tray...with two fortune cookies.  And our tradition was to crack open those cookies and read our fortunes aloud.  On that day...in the very midst of months of waiting, doubting, and hoping, my fortune said this....

I'm pretty sure I nearly fell off my chair.  The words that bounced off that tiny piece of paper resonated with my heart and soul.  I couldn't believe that such encouragement could come from a fortune cookie.  But it did!  And just this morning as I opened our desk drawer, I noticed that fortune just laying there.  I had kept it.  Had forgotten about it.  But for some reason...even though it's been there for YEARS ever since...I noticed it again today.  And it spoke to me again.  

I love when we're blessed in the most random of ways.  From the most unlikely sources.  Whether it's from a fortune cookie, billboard, tv commercial, or song...a post on Facebook, a text from a friend, or the laughter of a perfect stranger...you never know who's life you're making a difference in.  And just when you need some encouragement, look for it...or it just might find you...like in the case of my fortune cookie.  

Filling Your Home with a Spirit of Thankfulness

Thanksgiving is just under three weeks away.  Whether you're hosting a Thanksgiving dinner, planning to entertain friends, or hoping to extend the season of thankfulness onto the little ones in your life, here are some simple, yet beautiful, ways to add the spirit of gratitude into your home.

 <Click on each image for directions and to link you to its original website.>


[1]  Thankfulness Tree

Idea: If you don't have access to sticks or twigs, you could place a paper cutout tree trunk on a wall in your home and allow children and adults to write things they're thankful for onto leaves (either real or paper cutouts) and place them onto the tree.  Another variation could be to create a turkey and write things you're thankful for onto feathers (paper feathers would probably work best) and place them onto the turkey.  A "grateful chain" idea is also available <here>.  The possibilities are really endless on this one.


[2]  Corn Kernel Centerpiece

Idea: Give each person at your dinner table three (or more) kernels of corn on their dinner plate each night...starting now and leading up to Thanksgiving...and take turns share three things you're thankful for from the day, before starting your mealtime.  Then add your kernels to the centerpiece.  Instead of corn, you could substitute acorns or cranberries, too.


[3]  "Give Thanks" Centerpiece

Idea: The idea of placing letters on toothpicks and adding them to a centerpiece is so cute.  These toothpick letters could also be placed on a cake or cupcakes, to spell out the different Thanksgiving dinner entrees (ex. "baked corn" toothpick letters placed in the baked corn casserole), and so on.  You might also substitute your family's last name into the centerpiece for your extended family gathering or use some other "thankful" words or phrases like grateful, Happy Thanksgiving, blessings, family, gifts from the Lord, etc.


[4]  Table Setting

Idea: Prepare these for your Thanksgiving dinner or consider using them at your dinner table for the week(s) leading up to Thanksgiving.  If your kids are little, encourage them to draw a picture (instead of words) to capture their heart of gratitude.  Cutting these words or pictures out and adding them to your "thankfulness tree" (see example above) could kill two birds with one stone...so to speak.


[5]  "Give Thanks" Decoration

Idea: Get your kids involved in this one.  Even if your children are young, use a marker to write the letter onto each fruit before having your kids push the cloves into the fruit.  Pears, oranges, apples, etc. could be used.  If you want to keep them for years to come, purchase artificial fruit.


[6] Place Mat & Pilgrim Hat Crayon Holder

Click <here> to access instructions and to download the place mat template.




[7]  Countdown to Thanksgiving

Idea: If creating a dozen (or more) hand-print turkeys seems like a daunting task, consider gather leaves from outside and numbering them.  Your kids might enjoy cutting out paper apples or paper leaves, etc. with some adult supervision.  :)


[8]  Thanksgiving Clothespin Wreath



Please share other ideas you have of ways you and your family help to fill your home with a spirit of thankfulness in the month of November.